Growing up, I was fascinated by warriors. This endless fascination was driven by a very active imagination and fueled by reading history books, comic books and watching movies. I enthusiastically envisioned a soldier fighting a war, an ancient tribesman in the bush or a deep cover secret agent. Together with my friends, we endlessly played out sweeping battle scenarios acting as fierce, armed and fearless warriors punctuating the relative stillness of the neighborhood with noises, bangs and battle cries. It was all just too much fun!
I was simply enamored with being a warrior, and his fighting, yet I never inquired about what it was that was so important for the real life warrior that he had to fight…
Later as a testosterone driven, agile and very strong young man, the imaginative play of my younger innocent years gave way to the real life battles and wounds that were literally fought over the smallest of issues. A slight to my ego or an ill perceived comment triggered some insecurity. I felt easily offended and often totally and unnecessarily escalated into actual mayhem.
On a big picture scale, I really had no idea who I was, where I was going and instead of having some discernment about what I would fight for, I just fought for the sake of fighting and even looked for reasons to fight! Fortunately, those fighting days are now long behind me. Since then, I have had the gift of time, emotional maturity and education to now know what it is that I will fight for.
Today, I believe the perception of a warrior is someone in a real war. World wide, men and women are fighting very real battles with the Ultimate Sacrifice on the line. This is something I cannot even imagine and I truly have tremendous respect, admiration and gratitude for that type of commitment and risk.
There is another warrior who is not in the kind of war where his life is literally at stake. This man fights the battles that just being a person living life puts in his way. How he negotiates the very real challenges at work, at home, with his health, with his children and with his woman aid greatly in defining the quality of him as either a Warrior or Wuss.
What words do we use to most accurately convey the quality or description of Warrior when referring to someone? And by the way, warrior is not just a masculine attribute or characteristic. I know, love and respect plenty of women who also embody the best of what it is to be a warrior.
Warrior:
• courageous
• persevering
• strong
• skillful
• focused
• clear
• decisive
An important note: Any warrior can take these listed qualities and create something larger than himself that benefits society as a whole. Conversely a warrior with ill, aggressive, misdirected, unconscious or combative intentions can, with these same qualities, create harm and significant discord for as many, or more, people.
AND: in the interest of keeping things simple, because I risk complicating this short essay with having to address the wide variety of psychological, psychosexual, cultural and socioeconomic pieces of this extraordinarily large puzzle, I will use the “every day” man who has his own share of stories, upsets and challenges as an example of the warrior potential available when he is fully engaged in living life to its fullest.
For example, using this “every day” man, when he knows:
- Who he is
- Where he is going
- and What he will fight for
-
- can choose to be:
- courageous and risk displeasing others when his YES means YES… and his NO means NO
- persevering with his inner strength and be strong enough to hold space for the wild feminine spirit
- decisive because he is a leader in bringing his family and community up to the next level
- focused and Present so that his attention is unwavering:
-
- when he is holding his child
- making love to his woman
- when he is fulfilling his Higher Purpose
Choice….it is all because you CHOOSE to be a warrior that life and others will open up to you.
Is it worth fighting for the PEACE OF MIND that comes from knowing and demonstrating that:
• you are courageous and stand up for what you believe?
• you are a man who keeps his word?
• you didn’t give up even when the going got unpredictably and unbelievably rough?
• you are clear instead of being lost in endless confusion?
• you are strong enough to protect yourself and those you love?
• you are a master in your profession because you applied yourself beyond any limit?
• you drank in and savored e v e r y precious drop available from:
- every hug you had with your child
- the intimate connection of making love and experiencing the deep richness and texture of those uncharted depths
- just listening and marveling at the tones coming from each unique living creature
- your family and community thriving instead of just surviving
In direct contrast, what do you think would happen if you chose to live life as a Wuss: (as defined by the Urban and Encarta Dictionaries)
• “a male person with a low courage factor… (politically correct for gutless?)
• passive…
• emotionally / physically weak…
• ineffectual…
• unwilling to do something exciting or dangerous.”
Clearly, we can extrapolate outwards how adopting Warrior or Wuss will greatly determine our quality of life and the people we will attract. Over my life, I absolutely know and remember when I have been the Wuss… when I have given up my power in relationship…when I was stuck in my head analyzing all the details while life and joy slipped through my fingers….when doubt clouded my vision and when I lacked the emotional stability which compelled me to fight for all the wrong reasons. I *had* to experience the consequences of being that Wuss in order to know that I wasn’t going to do that anymore!
I now choose to live life differently…I take my life by the horns with a Warrior like essence and quite naturally, on a daily basis, enjoin the battle that defines how I live my life.
In summary, it is my contention that when a man discovers and intuitively knows:
• Who he is
• Where he is going
• and What he will fight for
—- > that this is reflective of a true and open connection to his intuitive masculine power and fueled by integrated Core Masculine Principles, he will effortlessly generate warrior like qualities and experience a life of ease and grace.
This is exactly what we work on at every Sunday Men’s Circle that meets weekly here in Los Angeles.
We use basic and simple, yet highly effective, meditations to awaken the body that open the doors to greater awareness of our gut and result in allowing our minds to rest. There is time spent discussing and implementing the 7 Core Masculine Principles that provide a framework into which you plug the uniqueness of who you are and then powerfully and clearly step forward into life.
So, Warrior or Wuss? Regardless of the answer, come out and join the next SMC!
I invite your comments…Let your voice be heard!!